Clam bake captain. Tell me your crowd and I'll tell you how many pounds of shellfish, potatoes and corn to buy.
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Enter your guest count in the Only Clams planner and get pounds of clams, mussels, shrimp and sausage, plus potatoes and corn. For 8 regular eaters it's 8 lb of clams, 4 lb of mussels, 3 lb of shrimp, 4 lb of potatoes, 8 ears of corn and 2 lb of sausage. They're planning estimates, adjusted for appetite.
Add an inch or two of water or broth to a big pot, then layer potatoes, sausage, corn and shellfish on top. Cover and steam until the potatoes are tender and the shells open. Dump it on a paper-covered table and dig in.
Live clams and mussels close when you tap them. If one stays open after a tap, toss it. Same goes for cracked or broken shells.
Stay calm and clam on. Aw, shucks, thanks for coming. You're one in a krillion.
After steaming, throw away any clams or mussels that didn't open. Don't pry them open and hope for the best. Hope is not a food safety plan.
Melt butter over low heat with minced garlic for a couple of minutes, then add lemon juice and chopped parsley. Keep it warm in a small pot or mug. Dunk responsibly.
Hungry crew? Set the Only Clams appetite to big and it bumps everything up by a quarter. Ten big eaters means about 12.5 lb of clams and 13 ears of corn. Leftover corn is never a problem.
Why don't clams give to charity? Because they're shellfish. My clams also refuse to text back.
If the clam bake is one of many dishes, set the appetite to light and Only Clams trims each amount by a quarter. Four light eaters need about 3 lb of clams and 3 ears of corn. More room for dessert.
Keep live clams in the fridge in an open container covered with a damp towel so they can breathe. Never store them in a sealed bag or in fresh water. Cook them as soon as you can.
Once clams steam open, twist off the top shell and scoop the meat out with a small fork. Swish it in the broth to rinse off any grit. Save the clean shells for cute little salt dishes.
I said I'd make a small clam bake. I now own a 40-quart pot and a lobster bib with my name on it. Small is relative.
Turn on the lobster option in Only Clams and it adds one lobster per guest to the shopping list. Keep live lobsters cold and cook them the day you buy them. Butter budget not included.
Scrub the shells with a stiff brush under cold water. Soaking clams in cold salted water for about 20 minutes can help them spit out sand. Gritty clams ruin the vibe.
Cover the table with butcher paper or newspaper, set out bowls for shells, and put out lemon wedges, butter and seasoning. Paper towels at every seat. Bibs optional but encouraged.
My clams keep to themselves until they get into hot water. Then they finally open up. Honestly, relatable.
The Only Clams safety notes cover the big ones: toss cracked shells, tap-test open clams and discard any that stay closed after cooking. Keep live shellfish cold until they hit the pot. Nobody wants a souvenir stomachache.
Buy clams and mussels from a reputable market and ask to see the shellfish tag, which shows where and when they were harvested. Digging your own has local rules and closures, so check before you go. Safety tastes better.
Mix paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, cayenne, celery seed, black pepper and salt for a homemade seafood seasoning. Add a few bay leaves and lemon halves to the pot. Taste the broth before the seafood goes in.
Clams are supposedly happy, but nobody asks the clam. I asked one. It said nothing, which feels like a yes.
Pack seafood on plenty of ice and keep the cooler in the shade. Perishable food shouldn't sit out more than 2 hours, or 1 hour when it's above 90°F. Hot sand, cold clams.
Chill leftovers within 2 hours and use cooked seafood within about 3 to 4 days. Toss the corn and potatoes into a breakfast hash, or chop shellfish into chowder. Reheat to 165°F.
Dress code for my seafood boil: bib, lemon behind the ear and pants you don't love. Butter will find you. It always does.
Put the slow stuff like potatoes on the bottom, then sausage and corn, and the clams and mussels on top. The shellfish cook fast in the steam. Shrimp go in near the very end.
Stretch the seafood with extra potatoes, corn and sausage, and lean on mussels, which usually cost less than clams. Shop the day of the bake. Potluck the sides and desserts.
I spent $80 on seafood and everyone raved about the corn. The corn cost 50 cents. I'm not okay.
Plan about 2 tablespoons of melted butter per person for dipping, more if your crowd is serious. Add lemon wedges and a little garlic. Bring triple the napkins.
People who are pregnant, older adults and anyone with a weakened immune system should skip raw or undercooked shellfish. Cook clams until the shells open and shrimp until the flesh is opaque. When in doubt, cook it through.
Pull the stringy beard off mussels right before cooking by tugging it toward the hinge. Don't debeard hours early, since it can kill them. Fresh mussels are happy mussels.
Many beaches require permits for fires or ban them entirely, so check the local rules first. Keep a bucket of water nearby and drown the coals when you're done. Leave the beach cleaner than you found it.